Normal Life??

So what is "normal"? Busy with work, church, family, holiday preparations, planning for future, even retirement? Well, we're trying to have a "normal" life even day to day. But normal has become more intense with every effort to maximize each hour. Life is short for us all and we all need to value our time here on this earth, even if today or this month or this year is our last. What would we say different? What would we include in our routine?

Of course, we have had much cause to reconsider our priorities and to count our blessings. One is the blessing for the ability to work. Every day Jon expresses his gratitude to be able to work and actually get his hands dirty. He is anxious to get up early in the morning and get going while he has the energy. We are blessed to still have a working business.

We have enjoyed the blessing of friendship and service. We have received love and support from friends and loved ones near and far. Through the years of raising families, working and becoming so busy with our daily routines, there were so many we grew distant from and who somehow slipped away. How precious our relationships are! And how fortunate to be able to still enjoy those associations!

The blessing of our beautiful world. Just out our back gate we have the blessing of the beautiful trails of Mt. Diablo, and the peace and serenity enjoyed there. A few months ago, Jon didn't think he would be able to hike those trails again and it brought tears to his eyes. He makes every effort to walk in those hills 3-4 times a week as he regains his strength.

Just a few words about improvements. Each step seems so small and insignificant but when viewed as a whole over a period of weeks, they are notable improvements nonetheless. I mentioned he is walking several miles a week. He eats very well, enough where most of us would be gaining weight. But he has stayed the same weight over the last month. His diet doesn't allow for the normal weight gain with sugars, high carbs and fats.

Last week Jon had an Octreotide scan. The day before the scan, he was injected with a radioactive solution to illuminate parts of his body. This radioactive material will be in his body for at least a month and cannot even get through airline security without a doctor's medical note. The Octreotide scan which takes two different visits on two separate days, did not show any signs of cancer anywhere else in his body! Darn. We still can't locate the source of the cancer. This scan also shows other markers as to where the cancer may or may not be lurking. If it shows positive in any perspective then they would want to treat with further Octreotide. If it was negative the treatment would be further chemo. Fortunately these markers were right in the middle so there are no further things they want to prescribe at this time

Next week Jon will have an EchoCardiogram. They want to see if there is any stress on his heart from the round of Chemo or all the other things he has been subjected to. Midst all of this his oncologist called and suggested another CT scan. Jon is worried about all the radiation he has been subjected to and opted to wait until January. This will also give him time to really see if all the other things he is doing will have any affect.

We are sorry but no pictures at this time. Jon says he doesn't want to subject all his friends to so much ugly all at once and they will have to wait until his hair is long enough to see. It's growing but he's not combing it yet. Last week was his three-month mark. The doctor only gave him three months to live if he didn't do chemotherapy. Well, he feels better now than he did three months ago and we enjoy each day that we have together.

Home One Month

Jon has been home from Mexico for one month now and we see some marked improvement in his energy and well-being. We are learning so much with regard to nutrition and food and we are trying to follow very exact instructions we received in Mexico for diet. Jon eats three full meals a day. Breakfast always includes hot cereal, fresh fruit, main entre of eggs and toast, French toast, or pancakes/waffle, and fruit drink. Lunch and dinner always include homemade soup, chicken or fish, green salad or steamed vegetables. Every meal includes a "green drink". In the middle of the afternoon he has a protein drink with a snack, such as an energy bar, fruit, vegies with dip, wheat tortilla chips with salsa or guacamole, crackers and cheese, or yogurt and granola.

Preparing all this has become a part-time job. When buying groceries, everything is checked for ingredients. All sugar, processed white flour, preservatives, and red meat are not allowed in the diet. Boy, we could all be losing weight on this diet BUT since being home, Jon has put on 8 pounds!! His energy level is much better, although he still tires easily. He works a few hours every day; thank goodness for great help and winter schedule.

Had an appointment with the University of California at San Francisco (UCSF) a few weeks ago and it proved very informative as we move forward on finding the source of cancer, exactly what kind of cancer Jon is dealing with and how aggressive it is. New knowledge will help in determining what kind of treatment to pursue. The doctor was a very nice woman, liver specialist, who didn't really want to hear about what went on in Mexico. She admited Jon looked great, in fact she was quite surprised to see him looking so good from the facts she had seen in his file. However, she did ask how they did liver hyperthermia, a liver specialist who had no idea how to heat the liver. Before we left, she asked us to keep an open mind to chemotherapy in the future even though Jon had such a horrible experience. She was kind enough to give us her direct office number in case we needed to chat in the future.

We have had Jon's family visiting since his return home. His brother Doug came from Maryland and was here for great company, help and advice. Also his mother and two sisters came down from Idaho and we had lots of hugs and laughs.

Small and Simple Things

Jon has been home from Mexico and treatment 8 days now. Tessa and Kaylinn came home last Friday for the weekend and that was great. It pushed Jon a little more than he normally would have since we attended the temple, spent some time at the Walnut Festival, attended church on Sunday and did lots of visiting and laughing.

The good news is after one week of being home Jon gained almost 2 pounds! That's the first gain since March and we are encouraged he is gaining strength. I spend many hours planning menus, shopping, cutting, mixing, and cooking. Everything is whole grain, whole foods and I like the challenge. It's paying off! Jon has been doing some light pool work a few hours a day and tries to get in a mile walk in the evening.

We have an appointment with a liver specialist at UC San Francisco on Tuesday and hope to find out what is available for treatment there. We have lots of questions and we know they go beyond the normal "standard procedures" for cancer. They are listed as one of the facilities that provide hyperthermia for cancer but don't know if liver cancer is included in the clinical studies.

Jon will go back to Mexico for treatment the middle of October for 2-3 days. This will provide some follow-up treatment and boosters to his system for the areas of concern. He also continues with handfuls of supplements every day set up by Dr. Bradford.

Jon's brother Doug arrived last night from Maryland and will be a great support for the next several days as they visit and laugh and work together. Doug is a government attorney and we are so happy to have him here helping . . . fix pool equipment! It's a good change of pace for him!

Thanks for Life

As is well stated and all are aware, this blog is to serve as a ongoing “Web Log” of my journey through the near death experience I was given. This may be one of the last needed additions to this blog. Although we will continue it just to limit the number of phone calls we take and the enormous time it takes to repeat the message, but this may well be the first of the last. It goes without saying, thanks be to Kaylinn and Dianna for all the time and effort they took to put this together and to add to it as needed. We have received many positive and encouraging comments by blog, email, letter, card, phone calls, and not to mention in person. So many thanks need to be given.

There are too many to count who have given of their unquestioning support with time, money, gifts, well wishes, hugs, and encouragement of every kind. I cannot begin to mention the heart-felt gratitude that Di and I feel for support in endless ways.

On the other hand, it has been stated by several the foolishness of my decisions to take my health care out of the hands of American-trained and FDA approved procedures and gallivant off to what would appear as a world that cannot be trusted. Astonishment even, that I would give thought to such a course has been expressed by many. “Surly,” they say, “you know of the corruption and vice that exist there. They don’t care about you they just want your money” I would like to take this entry to set those fears aside and to thank my Father in Heaven for offering me a new chance that many in my place are not given.

I do not in any way mean to construe this to be the whole story of my cancer journey, which will never be over and which is too long for a single entry in any journal. Let this simply be my eternal statement and testimony to all those who felt I was out of touch with the spirit and could not make decisions based on God given directions. I feel sorry that my life has been of such a poor example that some would not have trust in my ability to feel the directions of God after searching diligently for them. On the other hand, I more than understand the feeling exactly, by those who know me best, how this would give them reason to pause. I apologize for the many poor impressions I have left, and wish forgiveness from them and my God for having lived in such a way. The most troubling part is that I am but a man. I will no doubt add at later time, wonder and doubt again in their minds, how could “one such as he” ever have been so guided.

And so it starts that, in the beginning Dianna was impressed on an already busy day to take the time and talk to a friend. She was told by her of the place I eventually ended up. By this time I had been given dozens of web sites, telephone numbers, manuscripts, magic elixirs, and places I should look for help. So many people knew someone, something, or someplace I should look. Because I was so out of it, all these were never even looked at. Yet when this friend of Dianna’s called and gave me yet another web site, phone number, and person to talk to about her experience with American Biologic, the following day I was pressed, as it were, to call their number. I ask you, why that number and not the many dozens of other ones I received by well meaning and loving folks? Why be honestly moved to get up and call one, and not have that same feeling to call or research the others?

During my conversation with Dr. Bradford, the United States doctor that is responsible for this protocol and the founder of American Biologic, he told me I had a 60 percent chance of a cure. Along with many other things, most of which I do not remember, he said, “This is your only chance”. I reflected on that statement again and again. My trained doctor of oncology told me I had a 60 percent chance that chemo would do nothing for me but there were no other options. Take in mind, I didn't know either doctor. I only knew the testimony of one person who went to American Biologic and was given a new life. I am taking my oncologist's statement on faith that she knows what she is doing. I know of no one who has ever been cured of liver cancer under her care, and she had no names. So if you were me, what would you think to do? Add it up like I did and take 60 percent one way or the other and I think you would agree one sounds better based on my knowledge at the time. Take also into account that literally thousands have been praying for me, and that my name has been on countless prayer rolls in temples all over America from coast to coast. Remember, too, that the Priesthood of God was used in my behalf and I now stand as a witness to its power. After all that, what would you choose?

Let me add here, by the time I made this decision, I had my first and last round of chemo and had slipped greatly in my physical abilities to function. Chemo had taken me a huge step in the wrong direction by blasting my immune system with no follow-up to strengthen it, only encouragement to eat right. At this point I am convinced if I had had yet another round of chemo it would have been the sewing of the satin in the coffin, the final screws in the hinges, the fitting of the robes, and the purchase of the plot. I was so far down that I could easily see the end. I had stated more than once I wanted it over, and I didn’t know how much longer I could take it. Can you imagine giving another dose of poison to a person in that condition? Yet that is what my doctor here in America wanted to do. I had asked her, mind you, what she knew about hyperthermia and her response to me in part was, “It is not a standard therapy for any cancer that I know of. Sorry.” (I find out now it is available in the United States along with chemo but she was not willing to add it to her standard practice.)

So, along with many other moments in time, and a feeling I cannot explain except to those who have experienced it, of a calm re-assurance that I was being guided by a spirit larger than myself, I attended one more time the temple of our God in hopes for his assurance that I was not reading the many, many signs as more than mere coincidences. In that moment of pure celestial gratitude which I felt, I was assured that there was nothing wrong with what I had decided to do. It was no one else’s decision; I alone made it and secured Di’s agreement.

I have only to stand before you as a person who was given 90 days to live (and given poison to hurry up the process) who will live much longer. You alone will have to deal with this physical testimony that there are powers larger than life that were at work in me and I did, indeed, listen to them. Here I am, touch me, see, and believe that the death sentence was averted. Take it for what it is. Believe how you want to believe. But I am, at this point, very biased in my views. Am I special in my personal worthiness to have received this gift when others have not? I respond with a resounding NO. But there were, for reasons beyond my understanding, prayers by the thousands on my behalf to a loving God who listened to their pleadings. I am forever in their debt.

Once again, I wish my personal example would not have caused those to doubt. I am truly sorry. Yet at the same time they were adding to my healing moment with their own prayers. Again I am eternally grateful.

To summarize, there was guidance from the beginning. I knew ahead of time I was doing the right thing. This is why I could do “such a stupid thing”. Will I share what is available to others as I become aware? Of course, at the same time I will leave it to them to choose what they feel is right.

My gratitude is boundless to those who petitioned our God in my behalf. I simply state here to all who read, Thanks for Life!

NEW LEASE ON LIFE

Brought Jon home yesterday. So many, many have welcomed him home after his long battle the last 3 weeks in Mexico. When Jon went to Mexico for treatment, we were fearful he was too far advanced for anything to be of much help. He has come so far but it will still be an uphill battle for quite some time.

Dr. Bradford was so encouraged by the progress Jon has made. He stated that only 50% of the cancer patients respond to treatment as well as Jon did. That's a miracle for us! He was so impressed he wanted to take a CT scan there before sending Jon home. On our price list, that was a $400 fee and Jon told the doctor he would get one here at Kaiser upon his return. But the doctor said, "This one is on me." :)

Dr. Rodriguz came running down the hall, "Jon! Jon! You've got to come and see. Hurry and come." Jon said calmly, "As soon as I finish my lunch." Dr. Rodriguz says, "Oh, you can finish that later," as she grabbed his drip pole heading out the door.

The success of the hyperthermia treatment was literally evident in black and white, and Jon has shared the x-rays with me here at home. We compared the CT scan taken on July 16 next to the one taken Tuesday, August 18. How amazing! Many of the tumors were so large on July 16 it was easy to compare tumor for tumor on each film. There was an obvious 50% decrease in size and they didn't look too healthy, meaning not nice and round! We have been told that the complete affect of the treatments will not be for another 6-8 weeks as the tumors continue to shrink and die. So not only is his whole body a health and nutrition fighting factory, his tumors have been reduced by half. How amazing is that! What blessings we have received through Priesthood power! Thank you for your faith and prayers in Jon's behalf.

Dr. Bradford wanted to have Jon back in one month for just a few days. He will be put on IV for some very specific boosters to help in his fight. In the meantime, I am learning how to cook with real food. I actually spent an hour at Trader Joe's yesterday and will become very familiar with the food there, I'm sure. I am becoming expert at nutrition labels.

Today . . . what is Jon up to . . . pool service as usual. We have had wonderful help with the routes and Val Toland's son has been taking care of our commercial accounts. But Jon is looking into a few problems I couldn't handle on my own on his first day home. In fact, he couldn't wait to get his hands working again! He loves being home with his own bed and home atmosphere and smells, different from a hospital room!

ANNIVERSARY IN MEXICO

I had planned to keep this updated while I was with Jon in Mexico. I just got home about an hour ago and couldn't wait to bring you up to date on the great news. There at the hospital the internet was down and I didn't have wireless. Mexico does things a little different going through a phone line with a number that has to be changed with every use for security. The modem was down a lot so they called AT&T who sent a repairman with a new modem. The repairman left the new modem in the truck, brought in a used modem to replace the hospital modem. Then it didn't work at all, nothing! They called AT&T to complain but all they got was "sorry." The repairman was an independent contractor!

Words cannot begin to tell Jon's progress because it is so special and beautiful what has happened. Maybe if you could actually see the blood tests and pictures you could appreciate the miracle he has experienced over the last two weeks. I can tell you this much, we would have never received this treatment in the US. Dr. Bradford has done nothing but build up Jon's body with nutrition. He also uses herbs, vitamins and minerals to fight inflammation and rid the body of toxins. He drinks the "green drink" with every meal in addition to 9 bags of nutrients through IV (which take about 9 hours a day) and 52 pills by mouth during the day, one shot in the rear of B12 (Jon says it stings a lot for about 15 seconds) and a glass of saline mixture three times a day.

Speaking of meals, Jon's appetite has returned 80%. Now he looks forward to his meals and has them gone in short order whereas before he would just look at the food and force himself to eat, taking an hour to get through a meal. Last night he actually got the "munchies" and I went to the little kitchen there and got him an apple, some nuts and raisins to eat. I know the pain medication was key to his loss of appetite and how could he get better if he didn't eat, continued to get worse, more pain medication and the spiral down continues until . . .

And now there is no pain! The liver distress is gone! The swelling is gone! But Jon is still in the critical stage of cancer and there will be many months of follow-up treatment with a strict regime of diet and exercise. We were told to have another CT scan in eight weeks as the results of the heat treatments will not all be visible until then. If there are remaining problem areas, more follow-up treatments will be needed. Not chemo ever again!

We celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary . . . yes, in a hospital, but we are so happy!! We are already planning our next 30 years together . . . with a whole new outlook on the purpose and meaning of life.

And here's an interesting article for you about our freedoms being eroded out from under us, another reason why we had to go to Mexico for treatment. Go to: http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/healthfreedomusa/blastContent.jsp?email_blast_KEY=1077060&t= and read about the "Mother who may be forced to put son through Chemotherapy." (Sorry about the long address.)

BABY STEPS FORWARD

It has been two weeks since Jon checked into the hospital in Tijuana and has since been under their good care. It has been quite a journey for our family but one that has forever changed our lives. Words cannot express our appreciation for life, for family and for friends that have made our road easier to travel.

As we continue on this journey, we see how far we have come and look ahead as we know there is a long way to go. BUT Jon is moving forward, just little baby steps but it's forward. For example, he is totally off the pain medication, has been for three days now. On Saturday, he said for the first time in many weeks he enjoyed eating his breakfast, he actually felt hungry and it tasted good. Now that was just breakfast on Saturday but today, he said he was hungry for each meal and he wanted to eat. Another little step is his energy. He actually walked about a mile today, pretty slow but steady.

He will have more blood tests on Wednesday, his two week mark, and at that time Dr. Bradford and Dr. Rodriguz will evaluate whether he will need more heat treatments to the liver. I will be there on Wed. to see for myself the improvements to the blood, yeah! I will stay the rest of the week. Actually, we will celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary on Thursday so I've got to get real creative for that.
Jon has had some wonderful visits from friends who bring so much love and smiles, some who live there in So Calif. Another very good friend from Utah is there with him now, flew in yesterday and has stayed all day today and tomorrow. He brought so much laughter and memories with him to be such a lift for good. We had arranged beforehand with the doctor that this "intern" who was learning the program would be in to visit with the patients to talk with them. So in comes Barrie with his lab coat, stethescope, wig, glasses and . . . Billy Bob teeth! I was talking to Jon on the phone when he arrived and at first Jon says, "Oh the doctor is here . . . wait, he doesn't look right . . . I think it's Barrie!!" and he busted out laughing. It sounded so good to hear him laugh again! That was a giant step for Jon.